“Observe” said our teacher, his body taught with intent. He was leaning forward engaging our attention. His face was anxious, intense as if to coax a response from us. Were we interested? He seemed to doubt that. “Did we care?” he asked hesitantly. He had our rapt attention. We sat clinging to his every word but we were tongue tied. We had never come across anything like this before and we wanted to help. We wanted to make it easier for him. Why did he have to work so hard stating the obvious? He seemed so alone in his task. The hall was filled with a few hundred people. The older people were sitting on wooden benches down the back. The younger children were sitting on a carpet on the floor. Everyone was dressed impeccably.
“Are you aware?”, he shot out to no one in particular. “Or are you here for an entertainment?” He pushed his hair aside from his face as he glanced away from the spot lights focusing on the stage. We could see that he disliked the glare but the school wanted to film him addressing the children. We felt for him. We just wanted him to be comfortable and have a nice time.
He was beautiful to look at we assured each other, glad we were leaving something for posterity. He was slim, slight and glowed with health. His bearing was impressive but not overly distant. His face in repose had a marvelous composure that was compelling to watch. He always dressed with care in the formal white and tan colors favored by the Elders of our community.
“Are you aware of how you are sitting, of the light in this hall? Are you aware of your posture, of the way you breathe? Do you see the beautiful trees in this valley? Do you notice the sky, the clouds? Do you feel the immense wonder of it all? Or are you already lost in a world of your own making?” I sat up and braced my shoulders and looked at my friend.
He acknowledged me with a smile and looked back at the stage. Many of us were sitting up and paying attention to our surroundings. I had not realized there was so much to look at before.
Previously, I had been focused on the immediate instant that related to me exclusively. In the presence of people this often involved words. I had truly not considered that there was more to life with people than words. They seemed to use them all the time. So words had been all important till then; but here he was refreshingly denying words and inviting us to immerse our self in the wonder of life. Composure returned to his face as he gathered his thoughts after a bleak moment of despair. His face softened and became infused with affection as he looked at the sea of faces around him.
“Your parents”, he said urgently, “have sent you here to this beautiful valley to be educated. Do you wonder what you are being educated for? Will you grow up to accept life as it is? Will you find excellence or will you settle for less, get a good job and live mediocre lives like most people in this world? Do you ask yourself why you are here? If not, why not? It is your life! It is a very important question to put to your self. Do you do things because you are expected to? If so you are already following a pattern, aren’t you?”
He winced from the glare of the spot lights looking somewhat beleaguered. Taking out a handkerchief from his pocket he dabbed his temples. His eyes were watering. Blinking he adjusted himself on the platform he was sitting on. He smiled delightedly as many of us shifted our posture. He was appealing to a deeper sensitivity we all had but somehow we had lost sight of it. I looked up at him intrigued. We were held in suspense. Some of the kids smiled acknowledging each other. We had caught ourselves mimicking him. He was smiling, at our response seeing we had taken the point.
“Don’t lose sight of the great beauty of nature.” He went on urging us. “Ask yourself why amidst all this great beauty human beings cannot live in peace, in harmony. We speak of it all the time. We seek it all our lives. But watch your minds and find out why we live such shoddy, confused lives. Why do we endure such conflict? Why do we live in such hypocrisy? Why do we search endlessly for contentment, for nirvana or some silly thing like that? Watch your minds and find out why we sink into such despair.”
We sat vigilant for a moment of complete silence. It had been a long and intense talk. He put his hands together in a salute and getting up from the low platform stepped down carefully and walked away from the glare of the lights. He was heading towards the rose garden vibrant with flowers. Pausing by the pillars, he slipped on his footwear. We waited till he had finished. He started walking away as we scrambled to find our own slippers. We could smell the roses. The perfume from the garden hung heavy in the warm air.
Children were calling out around us. The teachers were talking together quietly. Others walked away in pairs and groups urging the children back to the class rooms for morning tea. I watched him walk away towards the Old Guest House where he stayed during his visits to the school. He had left us all behind and was walking into the cool shade of the huge tamarind trees that grew by the Post Office.
© 2022 Geetha Waters